A Shot Of Choklit

Choklit Child, Ghanaian-American, Lady Mountain of Awesomeness, A Beautiful Mess

Help me locate my younger brother.

Reblogged from kingkleopatra

genuinelyawful:

His name is Rayshawn. He ran away to NYC and is believed to be somewhere in Manhattan (i know, it’s huge). We haven’t seen him in over 2 weeks and have no way of contacting him. I’m very worried about his well being.  He skateboards so he might be riding around on one. Idk. I just really need to talk to him or at least know that he’s okay. 

I don’t really have any good pics but here are twoimage

image

I’d appreciate it if you reblogged this and spread the word. 

Reblogged from shevstheworld

pregnantfitmom:

casualblessings:

May you have enough money to pay your bills this month with a little extra left over for a bit of fun.

This is one of the nicest things to wish for someone

geekscoutcookies:

xopachi:

skwinky:

lntruding:


Have you ever been to earth?
On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:
You’re an idiot.
Let me further explain:
Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern.
Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.
When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito.
And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what:
Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND.
Nope.
My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET.
You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers.
And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE.
What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN.
I just want a burrito.
In conclusion:
You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.



UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”:
A fucking fork?
I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD.
If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER.
That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL.
Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS.
A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now.
People eat burritos with forks?
God is sorry he made us.
(Source)


I always need this on my blog.

I can’t be laughing this hard in the morning. 


Its back,and better.

It’s BACK!

Reblogged from walkerflexxasranger

geekscoutcookies:

xopachi:

skwinky:

lntruding:

Have you ever been to earth?

On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:

You’re an idiot.

Let me further explain:

Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern.

Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.

When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito.

And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what:

Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND.

Nope.

My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET.

You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers.

And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE.

What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN.

I just want a burrito.

In conclusion:

You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.


UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”:

A fucking fork?

I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD.

If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER.

That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL.

Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS.

A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now.

People eat burritos with forks?

God is sorry he made us.

(Source)

I always need this on my blog.

I can’t be laughing this hard in the morning. 

Its back,and better.

It’s BACK!

Reblogged from kindredsmile

adapto:

im screaming

Lmao!

Reblogged from ohsosupreme

ohsosupreme:

poetic-ness:

educated-ignorance:

its-illmatic:

h8girl:

tryllvester:

eurotrottest:

jadelorelle:

KOD last night 👯

KOD has the best strippers in the nation fuck what you heard

Amazing

going this weekend who’s comin

I need to go there. Imma take a trip to FL sometime.

SHE CAME OFF THE MOTHA FUCKIN RAFTERS!!! OFF THE RAFTERS!!!!!!

yoooooooo ahhh i need this

Shit. Would’ve been even more dope if they put a spotlight on her.

My hometown…and KOD is truly my fave :-)

Coffee, by Rayana Jay, available for purchase!

Reblogged from rayanajay

rayanajay:

rayanajay:

hey everyone! first off, i want to thank you all for your support of my newest single “Coffee.” i am really humbled by how many of you have listened and told me you loved it. i now have it for digital purchase on my bandcamp page. it’s only ONE DOLLAR!!!! (you can also donate more if you want to.)

spread the word, and remember…i couldn’t have done any of this without all of you. 

ONLY A DOLLAR!

*\o/*

"When was your last relationship and why did it end?"

Asked by girlovesrap

walkerflexxasranger:

http://vocaroo.com/i/s1BEU4bWBwzA

Walker, that response was so ….I’m not good with words but I’m glad you did what you had to do for you. Self preservation is ALWAYS key

DONT NOBODY GIVE A FUCK IF THE PUSSY AINT BALD

Reblogged from walkerflexxasranger

walkerflexasranger:

PUSSY HAIRS AINT NEVER, WILL NEVER, WONT NEVER STOP NOTHING.

Go down a waterslide when it isn’t wet and you’ll understand why foreplay is so important.

Reblogged from prettyboyshyflizzy

This is the best explanation ever

Real talk

Reblogged from escapedgoat

kissnecks:

boredandmoist:

This time last year I was unemployed, broke, and suicidal.

Today, I just got the keys to my first house.

Give it time.

every time I see this, I reblog it.
walkerflexxasranger:

nigeah:

dynastylnoire:

affectionate-anarchy:

boi-interrupted:

-imaginarythoughts-:

infamousindigochild:

thugger-thugger:

herunweddedhusband:

whenblackwasinvogue:

spencernoirexoxo:

4capproved:



It’s black people like this that ruin it for the rest of us. Self hatred is so ugly.

*Sigh* Disgusting

A tear just feel from face literally fell from my face literally

She dont love herself

The self hatred is so visible

"If God wanted natural hair he wouldn’t have gave someone the knowledge of the perm"
There are so many things wrong with that statement

What the fucking hell?!?!

This is the worst mess but I laughed real hard at ye olde emboldened and pray it’s not real

She’s been drinking clorox and calling it reality for eons. 

:’(

bruh

Reblogged from walkerflexxasranger

walkerflexxasranger:

nigeah:

dynastylnoire:

affectionate-anarchy:

boi-interrupted:

-imaginarythoughts-:

infamousindigochild:

thugger-thugger:

herunweddedhusband:

whenblackwasinvogue:

spencernoirexoxo:

4capproved:

image

It’s black people like this that ruin it for the rest of us. Self hatred is so ugly.

*Sigh* Disgusting

A tear just feel from face literally fell from my face literally

She dont love herself

The self hatred is so visible

"If God wanted natural hair he wouldn’t have gave someone the knowledge of the perm"

There are so many things wrong with that statement

What the fucking hell?!?!

This is the worst mess but I laughed real hard at ye olde emboldened and pray it’s not real

She’s been drinking clorox and calling it reality for eons.

:’(

bruh

Reblogged from sugahcane

queerblackbuddhist:

queerblackbuddhist:

These are screenshots from the website I’m working on creating. Essentially it’ll be a place where people can find black hair stylist in their area and a directory of online black hair resources (youtube channels, natural hair recipes, tutorials, online stores, etc) in one place that members can add to 

I have a quick 9 question online survey I need at least 40 people to respond to (right now I am 4) so that I can improve the site before it goes live.

Pleaseeeee do the survey and/or reblog this! 

I see this is still making the rounds but i gotta say the site: is called BlackHairEverywhere.com and well…

IT

GOT

MUCH

BETTER

"Call your mother. Tell her you love her. Remember you’re the only person who knows what her heart sounds like from the inside."

Reblogged from journeytoher

wow this made me sad.  (via girlsloveprettygirls)

mommy.

(via womaninthewoods)

(Source: pobredreamer)

Reblog if you’re gay, lesbian, bisexual, pansexual, asexual, transgender or a supporter.

Reblogged from iwalkless

This should be reblogged by everyone. Even if you’re straight, you should be a supporter.

thecorcorangroup10amspecial:

We’re thrilled to announce the launch of our new Live Who You Are ad campaign, shot by the incredible Annie Leibovitz. Each day, we’ll be releasing one new ad here as our “10am Special”, and give you an inside look at how our ad subjects live who they are.
Tyson Chandler & Family
Professional Basketball Player Upper East Side, New Yorkchampion presence
For basketball star Tyson Chandler, family life is built on the firmest of foundations: beautiful children, his loving wife Kimberly, and a modern home. At Corcoran, we use our expertise to find the perfect place to begin your family’s story. Because only by discovering who you are can we find you the house you’ll jump at the chance to buy. #livewhoyouare
Learn more at corcoran.com/livewhoyouare.
Watch the behind the scenes video here.

Reblogged from thecorcorangroup10amspecial

thecorcorangroup10amspecial:

We’re thrilled to announce the launch of our new Live Who You Are ad campaign, shot by the incredible Annie Leibovitz. Each day, we’ll be releasing one new ad here as our “10am Special”, and give you an inside look at how our ad subjects live who they are.

Tyson Chandler & Family

Professional Basketball Player
Upper East Side, New York

champion presence

For basketball star Tyson Chandler, family life is built on the firmest of foundations: beautiful children, his loving wife Kimberly, and a modern home. At Corcoran, we use our expertise to find the perfect place to begin your family’s story. Because only by discovering who you are can we find you the house you’ll jump at the chance to buy. #livewhoyouare

Learn more at corcoran.com/livewhoyouare.

Watch the behind the scenes video here.